Saturday, November 14, 2009

Conquering Your Fears Through Action

"I believe that anyone can conquer fear by doing the things he fears to do, provided he keeps doing them until he gets a record of successful experiences behind him.- Eleanor Roosevelt

Life brings with it many doubts and fears. But the unknown and the untried have held more people back than any lack of ability. Most successes are never seen because they're never attempted. The courage to face your fears can build momentum that creates magic. Each time you overcome an obstacle, a fear or a step back, you gain confidence. Every small victory helps you feel more certain of yourself and your direction, pushing you further and faster than you ever thought possible. You can do it! What's holding you back? True, fears are intimidating. So start small. Believe in yourself and take one small swipe at your fear today just to see what happens. If you can't talk yourself past the "point of no return," get a friend to help. In the end, half of the doing is in the deciding. If you stumble, don't be afraid to brush yourself off and jump back in.
" Sparkpeople.com Healthy Reflections

This brings back memories of my first life coach's advice. I'd get so paralyzed by decisions. He'd tell me to take action--even if I wasn't sure it was the "right" action. The only way you'll know is to just do something-anything is better than nothing. If you find out it's not what you really want, well then, you are one step closer to knowing what you do.

How often do we stay in our heads about a decision or something we want to move towards? We think it over and over, imagining all the scenarios of how it could go? Maybe we get as far as mapping it out on paper, but still can't decide which way to the "right" way to do it or even to begin.

Start by taking the struggle out of the equation. List all the ways to go about it. Just write for 10-15 min. No judgment. Put some steps in order according to how they make you feel - easiest to hardest. Include doing nothing, doing more research, or asking others for advice/help.

I'll use my own example of having to make decisions while remodeling my house. I am currently finishing up the living room and dining room. I want to remodel the bathrooms and kitchen next, but feel over whelmed by all the decisions I have to make including: buy everything at once to save money or not, where to store it if I do, colors of paint/flooring/cupboards/fixtures etc...

I just want to run screaming from the home improvement process!

My choices:


Ground Zero:
Do nothing and think about it some more.

Choice one:
Map it out on paper-one tiny part at a time and work out from there. What color paint do I want to use in one bathroom? Buy that and start (easy enough to change).

Choice two:
Map out the bare bones of overall project on paper from the big picture down. Leave some details blank for now. Ask a friend who has done this before to help me think it through.

Choice three: Decide on a few small things to buy first, then buy the most expensive items later and save some money.

Choice four:
Decide whether to buy it all at once and save the most money (which involves making lots of decisions first, buying it & storing it in my garage, & leaving my car outside for the winter).

Ack! Choice four seems WAY too overwhelming. Choices two & three speak to me and say "That feels do-able."
  • I will start with the overall look/feel I want to affect with the remodeling.
  • Ask my friend to help me sketch out various parts of the project & leave out details I'm not sure about at this time.
  • Move on to choice three by the end of the week.
I'll revisit my plan weekly. Now that feels do-able.

Can this process help you? Comment about conquering your own fears or indecision.

Let's encourage each other along to move through them into action.

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